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The Doctor is In

The Doctor Is In is a series of articles submitted by healthcare professionals on topics important to the ovarian cancer community.

Taking Care of the Woman with Ovarian Cancer

Katherine Easton, LCSW, OSW-C
Oncology Social Worker

When a woman is diagnosed with ovarian cancer it affects many of the people connected to her, including spouses, children, siblings, parents and friends. Cancer affects the entire family not merely the patient diagnosed with the disease.

Currently over 50 million people provide care to ill, disabled and elderly family members in the United States. In Georgia, there are over 800,000 caregivers. Ovarian cancer diagnosis and treatment can often cause a woman to become ill as she recovers from surgery and chemotherapy. She may experience multiple side-effects from the treatment limiting her ability to work, care for her home, her family and sometimes herself.

If you are a person that is close to a woman who has ovarian cancer, you may find yourself in a position to become a caregiver. No one actually ever expects or anticipates that they will be in a position to take care of another. There is no formal training for this job and many people may feel stressed as they take on new roles within the relationship and family.

When a family member has cancer, the equilibrium of the family may be disrupted for extended periods of time, adding to the stress of the primary caregiver. Caregiving is hard work. Caregiving is also loving, giving and sharing.

• There are a number of ways that you can support your loved one who has cancer. Begin by exploring feelings, "What is this like for you? How are you doing?"
• Offer reassurance, "You can do this. I am here for you." Resist the temptation to take over, help her maintain control over her life.
• Talk about things other than her cancer. Enjoy time together and make plans for the future; a trip, an event, something she can look forward to.
• Don't be afraid to touch her; loving touch shows her you care.
• Remind each other this is no one's fault. She needs to know that people will help her through the experience and be there for the long haul.

Caregiving can be a very emotional experience. Sharing the journey through cancer with a loved one may present powerful and sometimes painful emotions. Common emotions experienced by caregivers include a feeling of helplessness, anger, confusion, shock and disbelief, fear and guilt. Depression among caregivers is almost twice the rate of the general population, so caregivers must pay close attention to their own self-care.

Make sure you make the time to take care of yourself. "Caring for the caregiver" will allow you to maintain your physical and emotional health. Important self-care techniques such as asking for help, being able to say "no," and accepting that you cannot "fix" everything will help you understand your role as a caregiver. Ways to reduce caregiver stress include regular exercise, taking a break, enjoying leisure time, and using humor; laugh when you can! The most important thing caregivers can do for themselves and the person they love with cancer is to communicate. Open and honest communication and the ability to maintain flexibility in difficult times is often the key to the most successful cancer experience.

References:

Cancer for Two: An Inspiring True Story and Guide for Patients and Their Partners; Dave Balch, A Few Good People Publishers, Twin Peaks, CA 2006.

Caring for Family or Friends with Cancer; Susannah L. Rose, MSSW, Richard Hara, Phd. Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center, Jones & Bartlett Publishers, Sudbury, MA 2005.

Caring for a Loved One with Advanced Cancer: Determinants of Psychological Distress in Family Caregivers, Journal of Palliative Medicine, Volume 9, Number 4, 2006.

The Stress of Family Caregiving: Your Health May Be at Risk, Tricia O'Brien, TAKE CARE! Self-Care for the Family Caregiver, National Family Caregivers Association, Winter 2006.

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